Dating is a full time job. It is a full time job that is difficult at best. A full time job that can be mentally draining. A full time job that might pay off but might not. It is a full time job that so many people elect to participate in, in hopes of finding that one person to call their own.
I've elected to take this job and at times its seems like fun but at other times it is down right frustrating. Throw your hand up and say screw it frustrating. But I have always vowed not to be that woman who become bitter and gives up on the chance of find love.
What part of dating do I like or despise? I like the opportunity to meet people from all walks of life. I like talking to men who I wouldn't normally get the chance to get to know. What do I despise? I despise first date, the unknown, not knowing if something you say will touch or repulse someone. I despise the unknown element of dating. But despite it all, I continue to kiss frogs in order to find my prince. In my latest profile, I said I want to be able to lay down my superwoman cape and put my trust in one man. It's a scary thought but one that I long for. Being Superwoman can get to be tiring after a while!
In looking back at my evolution during dating I've come to realize some mistakes that I have made. The first is that I date too often! I need to concentrate on one guy and give him my all. The next is I tend to show my enthusiasm too early on. I feel that it takes the challenge out of the courtship. But upon further reflection, this is a pattern that I have exhibited since I started liking boys. This is my biggest challenge to overcome. The next is I tend not to follow my gut feelings quick enough. Many times from the start I have reservations but then I fall back on my understanding nature and give the situation a chance but ultimately the same reservation that I had in the beginning is the one that I fall back on to end the relationship. Lastly, I tend to allow guys to hang on for too long. I have countless guys who stay in touch and its with the hope that I will take them back. I've learned not to take them back but I haven't mastered the art of cutting them off so it doesn't drag on.
Enough for tonight....enjoy your read and count your blessings always
Sunday, October 30, 2016
Saturday, August 27, 2016
INKLEINED
Before my first date with Mr. Klein at a Winery near my home we had already decided on the second date. We met and immediately hit it off but then again we already knew that we would since our phone conversations were chock full of laughter. Our second date was going to see Colbie Collait and oh my did we have a great time. Mr. Klein had a ready laugh and was a gentleman. He was thoughtful as he had a bag of chocolate ready for me at each of our dates. Mr. Klein was patient as I did not allow him to kiss me until our fifth date. One the fifth date we kissed and he made it clear that it was well worth the wait.
Mr. Klein was always open to new experiences so we went to street festivals, kayaking and ultimately we went on a trip to Florida.
During the ten months that we dated we never placed a label on our relationship. In fact, we never spoke about our relationship as being a relationship. We stayed in touch with each other but were never fully invested in each others day to day life. We saw each other every two weekends and I labeled him my Sunday man! I always knew that whatever was in store for that day, Mr. Klein had thought it through and my pleasure was first on his list. I liked him throughout our time together but never felt anything stronger than a tender feeling towards him. Our sex life was intense to say the least. He was a breast man and he could spend hours playing with my girls. In fact I have not met a man since who has worshiped my girls as well as Mr. Klein.
We went on a trip to Florida during the holidays and although I wanted it to be a fabulous time, it was not. He struggled with the recent death of his father and during our trip he was very sad. It was a five day trip that seemed to stretch a lifetime. He would leave me at the pool or beach to go of on his own to think. I found myself by myself quite often. Being who I am I made the most of it.
Our last night in South Beach, we went to the Fountainbleu for dinner. We sat at the Blue bar and I had the most delicious lemon drop martinis. Yes I said plural! Five to be exact! As we walked to the I did not feel the effects of drinking such a large quantity of Martinis! But as the elevator ascended slowly to our floor I began to realize that I was drunk beyond anything I had ever experienced before. That night, I worshipped the porcelain god and begged for mercy. Mercy finally came and I was able to sleep restlessly. I remember that we had sex, exceptional sex and I remember saying "I Love You" and Mr. Kleins' response was to tell me "No you don't, its the alcohol talking!" I was able to get up to catch our flight the next morning and Mr. Klein was surprised that I was operational! I remember thinking that thats the difference between he and I. He would wallow in the negativity and I stayed focused on the task which was get my ass on the airplane on time. During our plane ride, Mr. Klein had a break down and cried about his dad. Of course I had to counsel him and that summed up how I felt about my role on this trip. I realized that Mr. Klein used me as a counselor and it was draining.
Once we got home, I told Mr. Klein that I was not going to meet him later to bring in New Years Eve. He was upset but I stood my ground and stayed home alone.
The day he dropped me home from our trip is the last time I saw Mr. Klein. We agreed to sit and talk but we never did. That was fine with me.
Two years later, when speaking to Mr. Klein, he let it slip that he had mechanical problems during sex with me because he had been juggling two of us. I was floored by this fact as he had given me no indication that he was seeing someone else.
Moral of this Dating Story: The most attentive person can be so because they are hiding their true intentions.
Mr. Klein was always open to new experiences so we went to street festivals, kayaking and ultimately we went on a trip to Florida.
During the ten months that we dated we never placed a label on our relationship. In fact, we never spoke about our relationship as being a relationship. We stayed in touch with each other but were never fully invested in each others day to day life. We saw each other every two weekends and I labeled him my Sunday man! I always knew that whatever was in store for that day, Mr. Klein had thought it through and my pleasure was first on his list. I liked him throughout our time together but never felt anything stronger than a tender feeling towards him. Our sex life was intense to say the least. He was a breast man and he could spend hours playing with my girls. In fact I have not met a man since who has worshiped my girls as well as Mr. Klein.
We went on a trip to Florida during the holidays and although I wanted it to be a fabulous time, it was not. He struggled with the recent death of his father and during our trip he was very sad. It was a five day trip that seemed to stretch a lifetime. He would leave me at the pool or beach to go of on his own to think. I found myself by myself quite often. Being who I am I made the most of it.
Our last night in South Beach, we went to the Fountainbleu for dinner. We sat at the Blue bar and I had the most delicious lemon drop martinis. Yes I said plural! Five to be exact! As we walked to the I did not feel the effects of drinking such a large quantity of Martinis! But as the elevator ascended slowly to our floor I began to realize that I was drunk beyond anything I had ever experienced before. That night, I worshipped the porcelain god and begged for mercy. Mercy finally came and I was able to sleep restlessly. I remember that we had sex, exceptional sex and I remember saying "I Love You" and Mr. Kleins' response was to tell me "No you don't, its the alcohol talking!" I was able to get up to catch our flight the next morning and Mr. Klein was surprised that I was operational! I remember thinking that thats the difference between he and I. He would wallow in the negativity and I stayed focused on the task which was get my ass on the airplane on time. During our plane ride, Mr. Klein had a break down and cried about his dad. Of course I had to counsel him and that summed up how I felt about my role on this trip. I realized that Mr. Klein used me as a counselor and it was draining.
Once we got home, I told Mr. Klein that I was not going to meet him later to bring in New Years Eve. He was upset but I stood my ground and stayed home alone.
The day he dropped me home from our trip is the last time I saw Mr. Klein. We agreed to sit and talk but we never did. That was fine with me.
Two years later, when speaking to Mr. Klein, he let it slip that he had mechanical problems during sex with me because he had been juggling two of us. I was floored by this fact as he had given me no indication that he was seeing someone else.
Moral of this Dating Story: The most attentive person can be so because they are hiding their true intentions.
Monday, August 22, 2016
VENTURE CAPITALIST OR INVENTION CAPITALIST
Well, this dating story is truly my most recent date that I am sharing with you.
It starts in the Spring of 2016 when I was contacted by Jorge who claimed to be a Venture Capitalist. We spoke on the phone and my goodness did we hit it off. I was so excited because he seemed like a really down to earth guy. We agreed to meet for Breakfast but then later switched it to Lunch since his car was in an accident and he needed time to get back from the dealership.
He showed up and he was definitely portly. Tall but large and with a friendly face. At first he was shy but as time went on his personality started to come out and we talked like old friends. I was so smitten by this man who claimed to be self made but managed to stay humble. One of the things he explained to me was that he was borrowing a friends car that used to be his car. He said that the car had seen him through so much in his life that he couldn't get rid of it from his life. At the end of the date we kissed and it was so nice. He walked towards his 98 Honda and I thought to myself, that a Venture Capitalist should have a better car than that one. It left a niggling feeling in my mind but I put it to the side because he seemed so nice. I thought to myself even if he were not rich I would still like to date him. We planned another date but twice it was cancelled at the last minute by the Venture Capitalist. I got fed up because I felt that I was getting the run around so ultimately, I told him to move on and leave me alone. He tried contacting me again but I told him to buzz off. I told him that I am not desperate and would not put up with his inconsistent behavior. He responded OK and left me alone.
As time went by I noticed that he would visit my profile but never said anything to me. I finally inboxed him and said "If you look at my profile you might as well say hello!" So he did that. We started talking again and we decided to meet for a date the following week. We text in the time leading up to the date. His replies were not extensive nor did he ask me any questions that made me feel that his interest in me was strong. I even asked him about his interest in seeing me and he stated that he is very interested. I shared with him that I am interviewing for a job and he shared that he was in the process of interviewing Administrative Assistant candidates for his company. He told me that the salary would be $100,000 plus bonus and started asking me questions about why I would like to work for him. I answered his questions jokingly but at the end of our interchange I felt uneasy about his story of paying an AdMin so high a salary. The day of our date came and we met at an upscale restaurant in Rumson. Again our conversation flowed easily and I told him that I could notice that he had lost weight. He told me about his house in Red Bank but when he mentioned the road that it was located on I knew that it was really in Locust which is not a part of Red Bank. I questioned this and he explained about paying taxes to Middletown and Red Bank. I asked him why would a single man with no children chose to live in a big house. He simply stated that he bought it because he could. I accepted this. He continued to tell me that he drives the beat up Honda to keep himself humble. He stated that he drove it tonight. This immediately put up a red flag in my mind. This guy spoke of travel and eating at fancy restaurants but yet he shows up on a date in an old beat up car? Something didn't seem right! We parted ways and the doubts started to cloud my mind.
By Sunday I enlisted the help of my two guy best friends and asked their opinion about this guy. I text the Venture Capitalist and asked him his full name. He readily gave it to me. I immediately did a search of his name and came up with not much information. This was another red flag as a Google search usually yields tons of information on anyone! I then asked him if he would give me the address of his house but he said he would not since he does not trust easily. He said in time he will share information about his house. I asked him to send a picture of his house and I think that that put him over the edge! He responded that I am asking a lot of questions and that next I will ask for his Drivers License and his Social Security Number. I responded that I too have trust issues and am making sure that I am not being deceived. He responded by saying he's an honest guy and he does not appreciate my distrust. He bid me good luck and stated that we are not a match. I responded Ok and that was the end of the Invention Capitalist!
I knew that he was a fake because one of my guy best friends looked up a data base that he has access to that does a background check on individuals. His report of the Invention Capitalist showed that he lives in an Apartment in Newark! One he shares with his mother! It also didn't show any college education. This guy was definitely no Venture Capitalist!
The Morale of the Story? The little details tell the real story!
It starts in the Spring of 2016 when I was contacted by Jorge who claimed to be a Venture Capitalist. We spoke on the phone and my goodness did we hit it off. I was so excited because he seemed like a really down to earth guy. We agreed to meet for Breakfast but then later switched it to Lunch since his car was in an accident and he needed time to get back from the dealership.
He showed up and he was definitely portly. Tall but large and with a friendly face. At first he was shy but as time went on his personality started to come out and we talked like old friends. I was so smitten by this man who claimed to be self made but managed to stay humble. One of the things he explained to me was that he was borrowing a friends car that used to be his car. He said that the car had seen him through so much in his life that he couldn't get rid of it from his life. At the end of the date we kissed and it was so nice. He walked towards his 98 Honda and I thought to myself, that a Venture Capitalist should have a better car than that one. It left a niggling feeling in my mind but I put it to the side because he seemed so nice. I thought to myself even if he were not rich I would still like to date him. We planned another date but twice it was cancelled at the last minute by the Venture Capitalist. I got fed up because I felt that I was getting the run around so ultimately, I told him to move on and leave me alone. He tried contacting me again but I told him to buzz off. I told him that I am not desperate and would not put up with his inconsistent behavior. He responded OK and left me alone.
As time went by I noticed that he would visit my profile but never said anything to me. I finally inboxed him and said "If you look at my profile you might as well say hello!" So he did that. We started talking again and we decided to meet for a date the following week. We text in the time leading up to the date. His replies were not extensive nor did he ask me any questions that made me feel that his interest in me was strong. I even asked him about his interest in seeing me and he stated that he is very interested. I shared with him that I am interviewing for a job and he shared that he was in the process of interviewing Administrative Assistant candidates for his company. He told me that the salary would be $100,000 plus bonus and started asking me questions about why I would like to work for him. I answered his questions jokingly but at the end of our interchange I felt uneasy about his story of paying an AdMin so high a salary. The day of our date came and we met at an upscale restaurant in Rumson. Again our conversation flowed easily and I told him that I could notice that he had lost weight. He told me about his house in Red Bank but when he mentioned the road that it was located on I knew that it was really in Locust which is not a part of Red Bank. I questioned this and he explained about paying taxes to Middletown and Red Bank. I asked him why would a single man with no children chose to live in a big house. He simply stated that he bought it because he could. I accepted this. He continued to tell me that he drives the beat up Honda to keep himself humble. He stated that he drove it tonight. This immediately put up a red flag in my mind. This guy spoke of travel and eating at fancy restaurants but yet he shows up on a date in an old beat up car? Something didn't seem right! We parted ways and the doubts started to cloud my mind.
By Sunday I enlisted the help of my two guy best friends and asked their opinion about this guy. I text the Venture Capitalist and asked him his full name. He readily gave it to me. I immediately did a search of his name and came up with not much information. This was another red flag as a Google search usually yields tons of information on anyone! I then asked him if he would give me the address of his house but he said he would not since he does not trust easily. He said in time he will share information about his house. I asked him to send a picture of his house and I think that that put him over the edge! He responded that I am asking a lot of questions and that next I will ask for his Drivers License and his Social Security Number. I responded that I too have trust issues and am making sure that I am not being deceived. He responded by saying he's an honest guy and he does not appreciate my distrust. He bid me good luck and stated that we are not a match. I responded Ok and that was the end of the Invention Capitalist!
I knew that he was a fake because one of my guy best friends looked up a data base that he has access to that does a background check on individuals. His report of the Invention Capitalist showed that he lives in an Apartment in Newark! One he shares with his mother! It also didn't show any college education. This guy was definitely no Venture Capitalist!
The Morale of the Story? The little details tell the real story!
Saturday, August 20, 2016
MY TWO BEST FRIENDS
These guys are priceless additions to my life! I met them both online three years ago!
One is my love, my friend, my everything! We dated for over a year and at that time I was still going through my divorce process. I insisted that I didn't want to put a label on our relationship. He was what I needed during that time in my life. We saw each other every two weekends, spoke everyday, text all day long and in the evenings we FaceTime! He spoiled me. He helped me out financially and he was there to hear me cry and kept me strong through all I was going through.
At the point when I decided I wanted to put a label on the relationship, that put a brake on our relationship. I was so hurt but I came to realize that he was not meant to be mine past the time that we had together. We are friend, I listen to his tales of other women and we meet up every so often to see each other. We still text every day! He knows every guy that I go on a date with. He knows where my date is at, the time and my dates name. He has my back and checks on me to make sure that I get home safely. He is my relationship advisor! He gives me the guys perspective on things. Some of the stories I've shared with you, he told me from the beginning to walk away but I didn't listen. I am working on listening better to his advise because at the end of the day he has my best interest at heart.
My second love and friend is a guy I dated also. We only went on three dates. I met him and fell for him. He was so friendly, so generous and successful! I proceeded to profess how much I liked him and well that was the beginning of the end for us! Our first date he came with a bag that had three Victoria Secret bras in my size. He is a breast man and it brought him pleasure to buy me those bras! After we finished eating we went to Marshalls and everything I placed in the cart he bought for me. I had never met a guy who was so generous by nature! We went on two more dates and although we got along very well things never developed further. He told me I am too deep. That is his key word for I look too deeply into everything. He couldn't handle that.
He and I stayed in touch and I have been with him through his one relationship and the many other miscellaneous ones.
My interaction with both my guy best friends has helped me to learn the ways of a mans mind. I realize that they think differently from us women. They can separate feelings and playing women is second nature. Because of them I can navigate the hazards of men who don't deserve a second of my time.
I text with them both every day! I hear who they are dating, who they are screwing and I know all the faucets of their complicated lives!
At one point I questioned if my friendship with them would make me into a jaded person but I have discovered that it only makes me smarter in my interactions.
One is always supportive and gives great advice but in a gentle way. He will quickly tell me I told you so though!
The other gets exacerbated by my dating stories. He tells me to get off of online dating. He is harsher in his delivery of what is going on in my life. Some days he says I'm deep and then I don't hear from him for the rest of the day. That's my cue that he needs a break from my life saga!
I love them both because they have my best interest at heart. One I would gladly go into a relationship with but I know that he is not ready or open to the idea so I watch from the sidelines as he lives his life. In the long run I run too deeply for him!
My guy best friends are a part of my world and I love them for all they are to me.
#bestfriends
One is my love, my friend, my everything! We dated for over a year and at that time I was still going through my divorce process. I insisted that I didn't want to put a label on our relationship. He was what I needed during that time in my life. We saw each other every two weekends, spoke everyday, text all day long and in the evenings we FaceTime! He spoiled me. He helped me out financially and he was there to hear me cry and kept me strong through all I was going through.
At the point when I decided I wanted to put a label on the relationship, that put a brake on our relationship. I was so hurt but I came to realize that he was not meant to be mine past the time that we had together. We are friend, I listen to his tales of other women and we meet up every so often to see each other. We still text every day! He knows every guy that I go on a date with. He knows where my date is at, the time and my dates name. He has my back and checks on me to make sure that I get home safely. He is my relationship advisor! He gives me the guys perspective on things. Some of the stories I've shared with you, he told me from the beginning to walk away but I didn't listen. I am working on listening better to his advise because at the end of the day he has my best interest at heart.
My second love and friend is a guy I dated also. We only went on three dates. I met him and fell for him. He was so friendly, so generous and successful! I proceeded to profess how much I liked him and well that was the beginning of the end for us! Our first date he came with a bag that had three Victoria Secret bras in my size. He is a breast man and it brought him pleasure to buy me those bras! After we finished eating we went to Marshalls and everything I placed in the cart he bought for me. I had never met a guy who was so generous by nature! We went on two more dates and although we got along very well things never developed further. He told me I am too deep. That is his key word for I look too deeply into everything. He couldn't handle that.
He and I stayed in touch and I have been with him through his one relationship and the many other miscellaneous ones.
My interaction with both my guy best friends has helped me to learn the ways of a mans mind. I realize that they think differently from us women. They can separate feelings and playing women is second nature. Because of them I can navigate the hazards of men who don't deserve a second of my time.
I text with them both every day! I hear who they are dating, who they are screwing and I know all the faucets of their complicated lives!
At one point I questioned if my friendship with them would make me into a jaded person but I have discovered that it only makes me smarter in my interactions.
One is always supportive and gives great advice but in a gentle way. He will quickly tell me I told you so though!
The other gets exacerbated by my dating stories. He tells me to get off of online dating. He is harsher in his delivery of what is going on in my life. Some days he says I'm deep and then I don't hear from him for the rest of the day. That's my cue that he needs a break from my life saga!
I love them both because they have my best interest at heart. One I would gladly go into a relationship with but I know that he is not ready or open to the idea so I watch from the sidelines as he lives his life. In the long run I run too deeply for him!
My guy best friends are a part of my world and I love them for all they are to me.
#bestfriends
CLASS REUNION
It seemed like I had a stretch of time where guys whom I had connected with online but nothing came of it were all of a sudden coming out the woodworks again. This is the story of the Little mans class reunion.
Little man, who I did not know was short, contacted me on Match.com and asked to meet me for a drink and appetizers. I thought about it and we started texting each other over a week period. We spoke on the phone also which seems to be a dead art in the world of dating!
I knew that he worked as a Regional Manager at Sleepys, had never been married, had no kids and lived in the same town as my mom. I had concerns about men who have never been married and are in their 40s and beyond. I think it speaks of commitment issues or really bad character flaws. But I thought to myself he seems like a good Jewish guy so I agreed that we could go out that Saturday. I left the venue up to him and he quickly told me that a friend from High School would be playing in a band at Porta in Asbury Park. I thought that would be awesome to listen and dance to a band so we set our time to meet.
The day of the date, my instinct told me not to go so I text him and told him that my stomach was bothering me plus my daughter needed to be picked up from work at 10 pm that evening. He immediately called me and sounded like a cross between pissed and disappointed. I felt back so I told him I will try to make arrangements to have my daughter picked up by her sister. About 10 minutes after talking to him I text him to say that I can meet him at the designated time.
Two things that stood out in my conversations with him was the fact that he lived and has always lived in an apartment and he believes that people are quick to give up on a relationship hence he is wary to be in a relationship anymore. Those two facts seemed offsetting to me and were the reasons why I didn't want to go on the date with him I felt that he isn't on the same page as I am.
But.....I go to Porta to meet him and I see him and he is short. I mean S-H-O-R-T ! He looked like someone that you would never pair me with! It brought to mind his comment on the phone that I shouldn't wear heels since I want to be comfortable when dancing. My response at the time was to tell him that I am an expert at wearing heels and that dancing in heels is not an issue for me. Now I realize that he didn't want me to wear my heels because he literally came up to my chin in my Tory Burch wedges! He commented, "Oh you wore your heels" and I responded "Of course! I always do!" As we walked through the crowded he started running into an inordinate amount of people from his High School! I asked him if it was a Class reunion and he responded no.
Our date ended and I knew that I would never see or speak to this little man again. He had used me! He brought me to his informal class reunion to make himself look good. The guys were asking if I am his girlfriend and one guy even gave him a high five! I felt used and I was pissed! When we left he tried to hold my hand which I promptly told him No!
I have not heard from him and I am thankful!
The moral of this dating story? Everyone has an agenda. Be careful that they are not using you to fulfill theirs.
Little man, who I did not know was short, contacted me on Match.com and asked to meet me for a drink and appetizers. I thought about it and we started texting each other over a week period. We spoke on the phone also which seems to be a dead art in the world of dating!
I knew that he worked as a Regional Manager at Sleepys, had never been married, had no kids and lived in the same town as my mom. I had concerns about men who have never been married and are in their 40s and beyond. I think it speaks of commitment issues or really bad character flaws. But I thought to myself he seems like a good Jewish guy so I agreed that we could go out that Saturday. I left the venue up to him and he quickly told me that a friend from High School would be playing in a band at Porta in Asbury Park. I thought that would be awesome to listen and dance to a band so we set our time to meet.
The day of the date, my instinct told me not to go so I text him and told him that my stomach was bothering me plus my daughter needed to be picked up from work at 10 pm that evening. He immediately called me and sounded like a cross between pissed and disappointed. I felt back so I told him I will try to make arrangements to have my daughter picked up by her sister. About 10 minutes after talking to him I text him to say that I can meet him at the designated time.
Two things that stood out in my conversations with him was the fact that he lived and has always lived in an apartment and he believes that people are quick to give up on a relationship hence he is wary to be in a relationship anymore. Those two facts seemed offsetting to me and were the reasons why I didn't want to go on the date with him I felt that he isn't on the same page as I am.
But.....I go to Porta to meet him and I see him and he is short. I mean S-H-O-R-T ! He looked like someone that you would never pair me with! It brought to mind his comment on the phone that I shouldn't wear heels since I want to be comfortable when dancing. My response at the time was to tell him that I am an expert at wearing heels and that dancing in heels is not an issue for me. Now I realize that he didn't want me to wear my heels because he literally came up to my chin in my Tory Burch wedges! He commented, "Oh you wore your heels" and I responded "Of course! I always do!" As we walked through the crowded he started running into an inordinate amount of people from his High School! I asked him if it was a Class reunion and he responded no.
Our date ended and I knew that I would never see or speak to this little man again. He had used me! He brought me to his informal class reunion to make himself look good. The guys were asking if I am his girlfriend and one guy even gave him a high five! I felt used and I was pissed! When we left he tried to hold my hand which I promptly told him No!
I have not heard from him and I am thankful!
The moral of this dating story? Everyone has an agenda. Be careful that they are not using you to fulfill theirs.
WRONG APPRAISAL
This might be the gem of all my stories thus far. I met the Appraiser on Bumble and my goodness he seemed like a straight laced upstanding guy! He was a gentleman on the phone, text me nonstop and was all around a possible dream come true!
We agreed to meet within a few days of first making contact on Bumble and I felt so excited about meeting him. We met in Asbury Park at Cubacan restaurant and our conversation flowed effortlessly! He even gave me a card that expressed how happy he was to meet me and included a Starbucks gift card since my birthday had just passed. I was astonished and so happy at this sign of thoughtfulness! At the end of the date we kissed and my goodness did the fireworks go off! It went off so much that it got heated in the car! As my senses came back to reality I realized that his hand was moving in directions and touching where it shouldn't be, especially on a first date! I promptly let him know that we needed to stop and he reluctantly did so but not before suggesting that we go to his car which was in a more secluded area! My response was a resounding NO and he left to walk to his car. As I drove home I thought about the whole incident and realized the liberties that this man tried to take with me. I felt gross and wondered why he would think that it was ok to be so aggressive with me. I reached out to my guy best friend Cardinal and told him everything. He advised me to communicate how I was feeling to the Appraiser. Once safely home, I sent him a text expressing my disbelief and discomfort in his behavior towards me. He apologized immediately and begged me to give him another chance. After thinking about it I agreed especially since he stated he will not attempt to kiss me. He said I am irresistible but he will show me what a gentleman he is and not touch me. We agreed to meet for a beach day and lunch in Asbury Park. In the mean time we continued to text and one morning he asked if I wanted to see a picture of his room. I told him yes I do and he sent me a picture. Well!!! The picture was of his naked chest exposed with everything below covered up as he laid on his bed. I told him I was surprised at his picture and he apologized again.
Monday came and we firmed up our plan to meet for Lunch. He again promised he would be a gentleman and I happily left to meet him.
We had a great lunch but opted not to go on the beach. At my car he got into the passenger seat so that I could drive him to his car. Mistake! He proceeded to kiss me again but this time his hand did not roam in the same manner as the first time. I reminded him that he said he wouldn't touch me but he stated he couldn't help himself since I was so irresistible. I promptly drove him to his car but I could sense an attitude shift in him.
I got home and decided I would address the matter especially since he didn't call or text to make sure I got home safely. He responded and told me he thought it was ridiculous that I set parameters on him. I explained that I do not really know him and that intimacy is viewed as part of my value and it is something that I do not hand out easily or quickly. We ended our texting on that note. Later I receive a text from him informing me that he was jumping in his pool and he wanted to know when can we "F". I read it with disbelief. I responded that that approach may work on other women but it was the wrong approach with me. After additional time I sent a follow up text expressing my disbelief and letting him know that I am not a desperate woman who would put up with a disrespectful guy such as himself. I got no response for hours but when he responded it was simply to say "When can we "F"?
This was all I needed to realize that this well educated, semiretired successful business owner was off his rockers! I never responded and I have never heard from him again!
The moral of this story ? Don't give a second change to someone who doesn't deserve it. Be aware of a wolf in sheep clothing.
We agreed to meet within a few days of first making contact on Bumble and I felt so excited about meeting him. We met in Asbury Park at Cubacan restaurant and our conversation flowed effortlessly! He even gave me a card that expressed how happy he was to meet me and included a Starbucks gift card since my birthday had just passed. I was astonished and so happy at this sign of thoughtfulness! At the end of the date we kissed and my goodness did the fireworks go off! It went off so much that it got heated in the car! As my senses came back to reality I realized that his hand was moving in directions and touching where it shouldn't be, especially on a first date! I promptly let him know that we needed to stop and he reluctantly did so but not before suggesting that we go to his car which was in a more secluded area! My response was a resounding NO and he left to walk to his car. As I drove home I thought about the whole incident and realized the liberties that this man tried to take with me. I felt gross and wondered why he would think that it was ok to be so aggressive with me. I reached out to my guy best friend Cardinal and told him everything. He advised me to communicate how I was feeling to the Appraiser. Once safely home, I sent him a text expressing my disbelief and discomfort in his behavior towards me. He apologized immediately and begged me to give him another chance. After thinking about it I agreed especially since he stated he will not attempt to kiss me. He said I am irresistible but he will show me what a gentleman he is and not touch me. We agreed to meet for a beach day and lunch in Asbury Park. In the mean time we continued to text and one morning he asked if I wanted to see a picture of his room. I told him yes I do and he sent me a picture. Well!!! The picture was of his naked chest exposed with everything below covered up as he laid on his bed. I told him I was surprised at his picture and he apologized again.
Monday came and we firmed up our plan to meet for Lunch. He again promised he would be a gentleman and I happily left to meet him.
We had a great lunch but opted not to go on the beach. At my car he got into the passenger seat so that I could drive him to his car. Mistake! He proceeded to kiss me again but this time his hand did not roam in the same manner as the first time. I reminded him that he said he wouldn't touch me but he stated he couldn't help himself since I was so irresistible. I promptly drove him to his car but I could sense an attitude shift in him.
I got home and decided I would address the matter especially since he didn't call or text to make sure I got home safely. He responded and told me he thought it was ridiculous that I set parameters on him. I explained that I do not really know him and that intimacy is viewed as part of my value and it is something that I do not hand out easily or quickly. We ended our texting on that note. Later I receive a text from him informing me that he was jumping in his pool and he wanted to know when can we "F". I read it with disbelief. I responded that that approach may work on other women but it was the wrong approach with me. After additional time I sent a follow up text expressing my disbelief and letting him know that I am not a desperate woman who would put up with a disrespectful guy such as himself. I got no response for hours but when he responded it was simply to say "When can we "F"?
This was all I needed to realize that this well educated, semiretired successful business owner was off his rockers! I never responded and I have never heard from him again!
The moral of this story ? Don't give a second change to someone who doesn't deserve it. Be aware of a wolf in sheep clothing.
THE PLUMBER WHOSE PLUMBING DIDN'T WORK
We went on a date in the beginning of 2016 and he seemed like a nice enough guy. When planning where to meet for dinner he suggested Applebees! I promptly said no to that suggestion and suggested Brios Italian Grille instead. I heading into this date with the thought that this was going nowhere because I was already turned off by the fact that a business owner would want to take me on a first date to Applebees as opposed to somewhere a bit more upscale.
My dates are usually at pricey high end restaurants so for me to go on a date to a chain restaurant was a huge step down! But I went and the date seemed to go well. He was a quiet guy and I found myself doing a lot of the talking. After the date we said good bye and I never heard from him again.
Well! Several months later I noticed that the Plumber had viewed my profile on Match.com. I sent him an inbox to say hello and we started chatting again but again nothing came of it. A few weeks later again he popped up and we agreed to go on another date. That date was so very nice and we saw each other once a week over a six week period. During that time, he was always a gentleman and he would kiss me goodnight but never pushed to come in or touched me inappropriately. I thought I had finally found a guy who was more interested in getting to know me as opposed to getting his hands on my body!
He had a cruise scheduled to Hawaii with his seventeen year old daughter and so he suggested that I come to his house to see him before he left. I was elated because this would be my first time at his place and I thought that he would have dinner for us. He came and picked me up since my daughter needed my car to visit a friend and we stopped at a local liquor store to buy a bottle of white wine. He needed my input since he wasn't a wine guy. We bought the wine and we then went to his house. I walked in expecting to smell the aroma of food but that was not the case! No food! We sat on his couch and watched a show about Sharks and it was like we were buddies watching TV together. I decided to take matters into my own hand and I initiated kissing him. We kissed and it was very nice! Things started heating up on the couch and I decided to feel below! I felt and nothing! I though well maybe he's just really small, which of course would be an issue for me but I felt around again. He stops kissing me and tells me that his guy was being shy. In my mind I thought "Oh no! He has plumbing issues!" Needless to say we headed home, he went on his cruise, stayed in touch during the cruise and he then cruised out of my life. I think that he realized he has plumbing issues and was embarrassed so it was better to just fade away.
The moral of this dating story? If a grown man is too much of a gentleman, it's because he has plumbing issues! Most men are trying their hardest to get you out of your clothes!
My dates are usually at pricey high end restaurants so for me to go on a date to a chain restaurant was a huge step down! But I went and the date seemed to go well. He was a quiet guy and I found myself doing a lot of the talking. After the date we said good bye and I never heard from him again.
Well! Several months later I noticed that the Plumber had viewed my profile on Match.com. I sent him an inbox to say hello and we started chatting again but again nothing came of it. A few weeks later again he popped up and we agreed to go on another date. That date was so very nice and we saw each other once a week over a six week period. During that time, he was always a gentleman and he would kiss me goodnight but never pushed to come in or touched me inappropriately. I thought I had finally found a guy who was more interested in getting to know me as opposed to getting his hands on my body!
He had a cruise scheduled to Hawaii with his seventeen year old daughter and so he suggested that I come to his house to see him before he left. I was elated because this would be my first time at his place and I thought that he would have dinner for us. He came and picked me up since my daughter needed my car to visit a friend and we stopped at a local liquor store to buy a bottle of white wine. He needed my input since he wasn't a wine guy. We bought the wine and we then went to his house. I walked in expecting to smell the aroma of food but that was not the case! No food! We sat on his couch and watched a show about Sharks and it was like we were buddies watching TV together. I decided to take matters into my own hand and I initiated kissing him. We kissed and it was very nice! Things started heating up on the couch and I decided to feel below! I felt and nothing! I though well maybe he's just really small, which of course would be an issue for me but I felt around again. He stops kissing me and tells me that his guy was being shy. In my mind I thought "Oh no! He has plumbing issues!" Needless to say we headed home, he went on his cruise, stayed in touch during the cruise and he then cruised out of my life. I think that he realized he has plumbing issues and was embarrassed so it was better to just fade away.
The moral of this dating story? If a grown man is too much of a gentleman, it's because he has plumbing issues! Most men are trying their hardest to get you out of your clothes!
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